“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
In a world where aging is often portrayed as the villain, lurking in the shadows, ready to snatch away our youthful glow and spontaneous adventures, I’ve come to embrace it as the unsung hero of my story. Imagine, if you will, aging as that friend who tells it like it is, bringing wisdom, depth, and a whole new level of confidence to the party.
As my birthday rolls around again, it serves as a reflective milestone, a moment to toast to the past, present, and future. Think of your birthday as your personal New Year’s Eve celebration, where new intentions are made, champagne is popped, and the promise of tomorrow glimmers brighter than the sequins on a dress.
My journey through the decades began with humble yet unforgettable celebrations. My ninth birthday was a day where simplicity turned into splendor, thanks to my parents’ magic touch. A massive [borrowed] house with a pool that seemed like an ocean to my eager eyes, a German Chocolate cake that tasted like it descended from heaven, and the electrifying tunes of U2 setting the night on fire. These moments, so vivid and cherished, are memories I carry in my heart.
Fast forward through the whirlwind of life, and suddenly, I found myself at the precipice of 40 and going through a divorce. The dreams of my youth, though not all realized, had morphed into something more profound—resilience, strength, and an unyielding zest for life. Even as I navigated the mess, I envisioned throwing a grand soiree for my 40th, a celebration of life’s ups and downs, its twists and turns. While the party plans remained just that—plans—the essence of celebration wasn’t lost. I spent my day surrounded by a few close friends, laughter, and a touch of fun with a smash-cake photoshoot, proving that age is but a number, and spirit is eternal.
Yet, as the night drew to a close, I found myself in my apartment alone, wine in hand, contemplating the journey thus far. It was a moment not only of sorrow, but of profound gratitude and introspection. What would I say to my younger self, given the chance? Perhaps to embrace every detour, to find beauty in imperfection, and to always, always celebrate the present.
Now, as I stand on the threshold of 44, I do so with a heart full of gratitude and eyes wide open to the beauty of aging. It’s not about losing youth but gaining wisdom, not about diminishing opportunities but about embracing new adventures with a fierceness and grace that only comes with experience. If I could turn back time and impart some hard-earned knowledge to my younger self, what advice would I give? What pearls of wisdom would I share?
44 Things I ‘d Tell My Younger Self:
- Be yourself!
- Don’t be afraid to try new things.
- Don’t be afraid to fail.
- You can’t take back words, choose them wisely.
- Fear of being abandoned makes you hold on way too tightly. It’s okay to let go.
- Take things one day at a time.
- Rejection is sometimes redirection.
- Work hard but remember to take breaks.
- Slow down.
- Not being OK is OK. Being positive is great, but it’s also OK to be in a bad mood, from time to time, just don’t stay there too long.
- Be Kind, to others AND yourself.
- Self-care is more than bubble baths. Taking time to practice self-care is not selfish.
- Forgive, holding on to hate just hurts you in the long run.
- Take risks.
- Run, exercise, move your body as much as you can, one day you won’t be able to, don’t let today be that day!
- Travel and spend your money on experiences not things, you can’t take that dress with you when you die!
- Listen to your intuition.
- You’re going to fall down, sometimes it will hurt, but get back up.
- Cry, it’s healing.
- Laugh, like a lot!! Multiple times a day!
- Map out a 5-year plan and then at the top write, BE FLEXIBLE AND TWEAK AS NEEDED!
- The grass is greener over there because they fertilize with shit!
- Stop worrying about the future, today is today.
- That is not for you to figure out today, that is for future you to figure out.
- Follow your passion.
- You aren’t alone, even if you feel alone.
- Money is NOT everything.
- Always take time for yourself, even if you are married and have kids, remember to take time for YOU, don’t lose yourself in your relationships.
- Saying no is OK!
- Don’t compare yourself to others, your journey is your journey.
- Treat others as you want to be treated.
- Dance and be silly, life is too short to give a shit what other people think. Maybe they’ll even be inspired by you!
- You are stronger than you know, but don’t let it harden you.
- Being soft doesn’t mean you are weak; it’s finding a balance.
- Some people are just crappy people, don’t spend your energy trying to change them or “get back at them” just move on.
- Sometimes being uncomfortable is exactly what you need!
- Believe in yourself. You can do a hell of a lot and more than you think.
- Tell the people you love that you love them.
- Being spontaneous can be fun!
- Life is hard, it gets easy then, it gets hard again, but then it gets easy again—it’s a cycle.
- You are going to learn a hell of a lot more in the next 22 years than you did in the first 22!
- Listen to your heart, your head, AND your gut—one isn’t always right. However, if something doesn’t feel right—it’s probably not right.
- It’s no one else’s job to make you happy. That’s on you love!
While I was writing this, a thought occurred to me: “What if bright-eyed 23-year-old Jasmine had access to this list?” What if, I had been handed a memoir filled with the profound mantras and whimsical missteps of my later life? Would my scenic journey, featuring ambitions, fallacies, and all the magic in between, have been the same?
Let me spill the cocktail truth: Had I passed the charming, not-yet-written chapters of my life’s bloopers and Marvels to 23-year-old Jasmine, sure, she might have dodged a few metaphoric taxis…But then, would she have ever danced in the rain by moonlight on a beach in Panama or backpacked 20 miles carrying a 40-pound pack. Each sway of the pendulum, be it in pure rain or wildfires, has molded her, ahem, I mean, me, into who I am today.
So, if I could whisper just one thing through time travel to that young woman with stars in her eyes, it would be this: “Jasmine, darling, the playbook of life cannot be written in advance, nor can its lessons be imparted through whispers from the future. Each joy, each setback, each serendipitous twist of fate is a brushstroke on the canvas of your becoming. Some days will be tough, and you might feel like the world is against you, but remember, it’s those very moments that will forge your resilience, spark your creativity, and lead you to discover the depths of your own strength. You are already a force to be reckoned with—a truly badass soul. Embrace each experience with open arms and an open heart, for they are the very essence of your story.”
Here’s to life – untamed, unpredictable, and incredibly beautiful. Here’s to embracing each year, each experience, each moment, and each day as the greatest gift of all.
Remember, You Got This!
As a transformation life coach, I specialize in empowering individuals to overcome obstacles, discover their true potential, and live a fulfilling life. Whether you’re facing personal challenges, seeking career clarity, or looking to enhance your overall well-being, I offer courses, workshops or personalized coaching sessions tailored to your specific needs. Remember it’s your journy, your rules!
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